Stop using the phrase "calling out"

If you'd have told me a few years ago it was possible to have a phrase in the English language that could showcase sheer arrogance and complete cowardice at the same time, I'd have called you a liar. Here we are though, now living with one that does exactly this: you'll know it as the delightful expression: "calling out".

You can correct someone if they get something wrong. If someone tells you there are 5 million people living in the UK, you may explain that, actually, that number's closer to 67 million. Fine. Today, though, this is nowhere near dramatic enough. When we correct someone now, we have to say we've "called them out" for misleading information. 

This, I can almost live with. The problem is, though, this same "called out" expression can be used when someone disagrees with something anyone has said or done, even if it's completely subjective. So, while many may think a person telling a provocative joke is funny, others may "call them out" for inappropriate behaviour. And therein lies the problem. 

By using the same expression to correct an objective fact as you do to disapprove of something, you are, quite simply, implying that your opinion is incontestable - and, I'm sorry, but it isn't. When you say you've "called someone out", you're suggesting that you're categorically in the right and that person is categorically in the wrong. Sadly, opinions don't really work like that.

In reality, the meaning of the phrase "calling out" changes with the situation: When someone presents an incorrect fact, the phrase "calling them out" means "correcting them" but, when they say something you don't like, "calling them out" really just means "disagreeing with them and getting a bit self-righteous about it"

Of course, disagreeing with someone is fine but, when you do, you should start a dialogue about it. By using the phrase "calling out", you're doing exactly the opposite; you're implying that you've immediately shut them down and that there's no need to engage in the matter any further. That's it. You've successfully silenced someone's opinion, and now the world should move on without any further questions. 

This is why it's such a sneaky little phrase; its syntax won't allow a rebuttal because it's so absolute and final: if someone has been "called out" (past tense), the story is over, and they have to accept their public failing while you go off and bask in your own morbid sense of self-satisfaction.

By far the biggest problem with the phrase is that it is incredibly destructive, particularly when used in a public forum. The phrase "calling out" is designed deliberately to provoke people and knock them off their feet while you sucker punch them with your seemingly untouchable viewpoint. It's no coincidence that it sounds very similar to the phrase "caught out", because it's designed to do exactly the same: It glorifies the public shaming of someone, gives them a ceremonious dressing down - possibly to distract from your own insecurities - and entices everyone to rally behind you with their proverbial pitchforks while you burn them at the stake.

In short, the term "calling out" is little more than a divisive, machiavellian phrase used by those deluded with grandeur that attempts to undermine and shame others while simultaneously distracting from their own insecurities and unwillingness to engage.

So, to avoid using such a toxic phrase, let's look at some alternatives (and note how these are separated by facts and opinions):

Facts

"I don't think that's right, I think the correct answer is..."

Opinions

"Actually, I don't agree with that because..."
"That's one view, but have you considered...? "
"I'll have to disagree with you there, because..."


You're welcome.

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